What topic to interest a man. How to interest a man: the right ways. Several effective methods

Every woman wants to have her soul mate by her side. So that he was near, understood and appreciated. But so often it is very difficult for women with men to find mutual understanding and a “common language”. Sometimes the male sex is too intrusive and it is impossible to endure the unnecessary harassment of the "wrong" suitors. And sometimes you really want to draw attention to yourself, like it, win it, in the end. But nothing works.

Let's consider this important question - how to captivate a man and not lose his attention. Moreover, we will consider this topic from several angles - both at the first meeting, and for couples who have been together for many years.

Of course, the theory of "mini-skirt, heels, beautiful makeup, blouse cutout, confident walk" works. And you will certainly soon feel an interested male look at yourself. But another question: what kind of a man will he be? Also, what relationship? Perhaps you will draw his attention to you, but real interest is unlikely. Intrigue, romance, unobtrusive relationships - the maximum that you get. What kind of man will it be? Most likely, a young guy, inexperienced in relationships, who is interested in light entertainment. If you are interested in a serious relationship with an accomplished, mature man, then a beautiful appearance on your part will not be enough. After all, for sure he will be interested not only in long legs, toned buttocks and beautiful breasts.

What's the secret?

And what is necessary to captivate a man so strongly that he seeks you and wants to communicate with you?

  1. The first point of the rules is this - when a man feels that he will be able to please a woman, then he will definitely seek her and take care of her, but if the man does not feel this, then he will not. And vice versa - a woman should also feel that she wants the courtship of this man, and should behave accordingly. It can be said that there must be a sense of conformity. Both a man and a woman should feel that they are suitable for each other. And they should behave accordingly. But how should a woman behave so that a man understands that she is the only one he was looking for? Coquetry is the answer to the question. Let the man know that you are not indifferent to him, he is interesting to you. So that he, at least, thinks that it will not be a mistake to approach you.
  2. The second is compliments. Do not be afraid to praise a man! But make sure it's not flattery. Compliment him on something he does really well, like driving, cooking, looking pretty.
  3. The third principle is listen to the man. Listen especially to his accomplishments and exploits. Just do not show condescension and irony in any case. Admire them! Whatever he does, even if this is not news to you, praise him and listen, listen, and once again, listen. He will certainly appreciate it. And if you reinforce this effect with questions of interest - how did he achieve this or how did he do it - the result will definitely not be long in coming.
    This rule almost always has a positive effect. Even when it seems to you that something is going wrong, know that you are wrong. A man, as a rule, can misunderstand something, think that he has no chance. Or vice versa, to think that he has a chance, in his complete absence. Therefore, the rule only works when there is a match between the desires of a man and a woman.
  4. The next golden rule in the process of winning a man is mystery. After all, if you immediately “open all the cards” in front of a man, he, at least, will become uninteresting. And it's not just about sex. Even vice versa! Regarding communication, attention, time of a woman. "A woman must be a mystery!" - says Verochka from the legendary Office Romance. The man is first and foremost a hunter. He must "hunt for his prey." Gotta get her attention. He is a player. And as in any game, its ending promises the loss of interest in it. And if a man either wins or loses, interest and excitement increase. Therefore, warm up his desire for you. Support all his actions, but do not open completely. Be interesting to him, play with him. Let him lose sometimes, among all his many wins. An accessible, deeply in love, submissive woman is doomed to failure. Let him get a little nervous, run after you, let him pick up an approach to you, let him discover you and your qualities. You don’t always have to agree with him, you don’t need to hang around his neck, you don’t always need to indulge him. And then his interest in you will never disappear.

But, on the other hand, do not "go too far." If you always win arguments, impose your opinion on him, show that you are always right, he will get tired of it exactly as quickly as in the previous case. And, at a minimum, he will find a replacement for you in his favorite pastime (sports, hunting, fishing, friends, etc.), and, as a maximum, he will completely break off relations. He doesn't need to always be wrong. Try to be equal with him, both in everyday life and in other common affairs and activities.

Communication time and distance between you

At the beginning of a relationship, try to communicate more with the man you are interested in. This will be enough to get close. After all, it is always easier to captivate a man with whom you spend some period of time together. This does not mean that it is necessary to achieve it right away. Communication at any level already brings together a man and a woman. Find some excuse, a reason to approach him once again, ask about something, ask a question. Try to be closer to him, but without excessive initiative (because remember that he should conquer you, not you him).

Not necessarily this communication should consist of positive impressions and emotions. Even if you argue a little, have a discussion, start a little conflict (not reaching a tantrum), it will be better than absolutely no communication. You can be convinced of this by the example of the film "Girls", where the conflict became the start of a relationship. The manifestation of a little aggressiveness at the beginning of communication may mean a man's disposition towards you. After all, even in childhood, boys show attention to girls by pulling their pigtails.

But a very close distance does not always bring a positive effect. So, colleagues who are always nearby are, of course, better than those man and woman who are in different parts of the globe, but far from the best option. Summing up, try to get close to a man, communicate with him more often (but in moderation).

Competition between two men

Well, the competition of several men for one woman. Despite the criticism of this method, it can be argued that it works. The problem is that it can be misunderstood and implemented. Therefore, it is better to read this advice several times, and then try to put it into practice.

Give him competition. This method works. Of course, here you need to be very careful, not to make mistakes, not to overdo it. Otherwise, the effect will be opposite. But if everything is done correctly, then the method will definitely work.

So, the secret of the success of such actions. It is necessary to organize a kind of competition for several men for you. The psychology of the male sex is simple - they are animals in their essence, which are similar to each other. And as soon as one of them has a “female” (especially if it has a leader who is worthy of respect), many seek to attract her attention.

One has only to recall the example of the heroine of the Soviet film "The Most Charming and Attractive" - ​​as soon as the girl "found" (having arranged it herself on the advice of her friend) a respectable man, the real object of her dreams (and not only him, but also other men from her department) immediately became indifferent to her.

As you can see, it works. If everything is correct and smart to do without making mistakes. What? Let's consider.

Well, First of all, you don’t need to flirt with another man if you have “his own”. This will cause a storm of indignation and angry jealousy. It is necessary that an outsider himself carefully shows signs of attention to you, and your man “accidentally” notices this. Well, you, of course, casually refused him.

Second mistake is the definition of "authority" of a man. Everyone has different priorities, just like tastes. Of course, consistency, good appearance and self-confidence are the most necessary qualities, but not always working. The most authoritative young man for one group of men will be the absolute losers for another. Therefore, try to determine what signs of "authority" are important for the object of your attention. Although it is often extremely difficult for a woman to determine this on her own.

Third mistake is that you can rely on the constant interest of a man from now on. And this is not so. Perhaps, as soon as the opponent disappears, interest will also disappear. It is impossible to be focused on this interest of a man, because he shows it in competition with other young people.

Here is a method full of contradictions. But, in principle, it works. The main thing is to do everything correctly and smartly. Think over each step in accordance with the points given in these tips. Every man wants to achieve a smart, wise woman, especially if he sees signs of attention in her direction from other men.#Secrets of female sexuality#

The carefree effect

Every man wants to feel carefree for a while. But, of course, there are situations when it is better not to disturb a man. If he has a disorder in his affairs, problems at work, chronic fatigue, lack of money, worries, in a word, if a man is full of worries and troubles, this is not the time for coquetry with him. He has to sort it all out. Survive, perhaps, then he will have an interest. This also applies to married men. Despite public opinion, I would like to argue that if everything is fine in the family, then the man will not have time for unnecessary flirting.

And exactly the opposite - if a man is doing well, he is successful, things are going well, he will certainly want to have fun and share his successes with someone. Take advantage of the moment!

This, of course, also applies to men on vacation. That is why the concept of "holiday romance" is so common. What exactly is a holiday romance? This is the time for a man when he can easily get close to the women he is interested in, and most importantly, forgets about his problems for a certain period of time. Rest, good mood, positive - all the components for at least pleasant communication!

You can even form such an exemplary law: "Male attraction to a woman is directly proportional to the carelessness of this man at the moment." However, as well as vice versa.

You can benefit from this rule. Of course, you need to understand that a man who has a lot of problems will not care for a woman and will not develop relationships. Better not even try to climb him. The manifestation of attention and coquetry of a woman, which he would otherwise have accepted, will now be rejected. They can only annoy him. Wait until this man solves all his problems and is ready to communicate with you. You can also listen to a man, try to support him, share his feelings with him.

Of course, the opposite is true. If you find the right moment when a man successfully conducts his business, even the most insignificant, succeeds in business, his career is on the rise, this man will definitely turn his attention to you.

Here are some practical methods. Of course, men are different, as are situations. In some cases, women overdo it, leaving no choice to the man. And the male gender doesn't like it. In other situations, a woman is uninitiated, and this man can also be frightened. You need to know the measure in everything and act reasonably. Each man needs to find his own approach.

A woman should not only be well-groomed, beautiful and please the eye of a man, but also interest him with her moral side, her developed intellectual life, her mind and morality. Surprise a man, make him think about you, open you like an unread book. A little cunning, wisdom, intelligence and charm - and you will certainly succeed!

Forget all those tricks that you use when communicating with your girlfriends. Men are a completely different audience. Speak in a way that grabs their attention, keeps their interest, and leaves a favorable impression. You must learn to change the style of communication and awaken a reaction in the interlocutor - this is the only way you will make them look forward to the next conversation with you.

Honest masculine view: men listen equally attentively to both their favorite radio programs and the people they are interested in. If you want to attract and keep a man's attention, learn how to have a casual conversation. Otherwise, your fans will lose interest too quickly and will not give you a chance to appear in front of them in all its glory.

A woman who wants to be an interesting conversationalist must be able to quickly capture the attention of a man, speak "with taste" and leave a favorable impression. So there are more chances that a man will “tune in to her wave”, and not disconnect from the conversation. By mastering the art of small talk, a woman will gain skills that will help her successfully develop personal relationships.

Think Men Have Attention Deficit Disorder

Many women complain that they are surrounded by men who either listen inattentively or prefer not to engage in long conversations at all. Often such women mistakenly believe that the problem lies precisely in the man. By dumping all the blame on the opposite sex, women absolutely do not take into account what influence they themselves have on the communication process. As tango requires two partners, so two must participate in a conversation.

If a woman communicates freely with her friends, then in order to obtain an equally pleasant result in a conversation with men, a little more effort is required. To easily communicate with the opposite sex, you need to bridge the gap over the abyss of mutual misunderstanding. This is possible if you are able to understand the peculiarities of the perception of another.

A conversation between two cannot be forgotten when the memories of it are pleasant to both, when it flows like music and captivates like sex. It has rhythm and predictability - something that everyone looks forward to and enjoys.
Jessamine West, American writer, author of The Land of the Merciless (1984)

Therefore, in order to encourage a man to listen and willingly participate in a conversation, a wise woman must communicate with him "on the same wavelength." Although not all men are the same, there are still some universal rules of communication that are suitable for the modest, who are speechless, and for those who like to talk.

Make men "tune in" to you

Here are some helpful tips on how to get men to listen to you carefully and participate in the conversation:

Speed ​​up the learning process!

Focus on developing your communication skills. To begin with, try to express thoughts briefly and give the interlocutor the opportunity to speak. Make sure you don't overwhelm other participants in the conversation.

To learn how to express yourself better, pay attention to how TV talk show hosts interact with their guests and viewers in the studio. Watch their facial expressions, gestures, glances, postures. Watch as these experienced interlocutors adjust the pace of speech, the pitch of their voice, in order to fully capture the attention of the audience.

A gossip is someone who talks to you about others, a bore is someone who talks to you about himself, and a brilliant conversationalist is someone who talks to you about you.
Lisa Kirk, American singer and musical comedy actress (1925-1990)

If we take on the experience of others and strive to develop, we can become a good conversationalist in a short period of time. Start improving your communication skills immediately!

Conclusion. In love, you are unlucky when you are considered a bad conversationalist. But if you learn how to have easy and relaxed conversations, “tune in to the wave” of a possible partner, you will definitely be lucky in love.

The sight of a naive person gives me pleasure, if only he is angry and endowed with intelligence.

The law of contrast is manifested in the ability to effectively demonstrate one's own originality.(not to be confused with inadequacy!) This law allows you not only to intrigue a man, but to excite his imagination so that he can never be disappointed in you.

When you use contrasts in clothes, it distracts from the flaws in the figure and skin of the face; when you use them in behavior, it distracts from the flaws in your character and intentions. And here's another thing: whoever does things that are not expected of him, whose reaction cannot be predicted in advance, is difficult to control. Your task is not to be a “peeled egg”, but to become the very “special case” over which he wants to break his head properly.

For example, you make a frank compliment to a man. It is clear that by doing this you show him your interest. But, hinting at your “availability” to reduce the physical distance between you, you are not in a hurry, that is, you don’t stuff yourself into mistresses - you don’t rush on your neck. You stand where you stood, showing restrained passion: it’s good with you, but it’s not bad without you. You flatter his pride and ... leave him alone. The signal is given - further - he should already himself.

But you can also perform the opposite action: approach him as close as possible and even touch his arm, expressively looking directly into his eyes. But then there is no need to say anything. When shortening the physical distance, speak only the language of touch. And vice versa: when seducing verbally, remember to keep a physical distance.

This subtle seduction always leaves a chance for you to back off in time. Look into his eyes and you will know for sure if you are on the right track. Thus, you can bring a man to a boiling point and at the same time keep the situation under control. And if you talk a lot, clap like a cow with long eyelashes, smile brightly with brightly painted lips and at the same time flutter in front of him in a miniskirt - think about who you will look like then?

Blog Manipulation-Female pickup- —

To really intrigue a guy, you need to make him think that you are charming and make him want to continue. You can't tell him everything at once, or make him recognize you in the first five minutes, or not want to get to know you better at all - or think about you while you are somewhere far away. So how do you create the perfect combination of mystery and excitement that can keep a guy intrigued? Start with Step 1.

Steps

Part 1

Intriguing Behavior

    Show a little interest. If a guy doesn't have something to work on, you won't get anything in return. You will not intrigue him if you treat him indifferently, and he will feel that you are not at all interested in you. So smile at him, wave, and start a light conversation with him. Flirt a little so he thinks you might like it, but don't let him know you want him. Just give him enough to make him think of you and want to meet again.

    Show him that you are having a great time. If you want to intrigue a guy, then you need to make him want to be with you. If you're in his line of sight, make sure you're having a great time with your friends, laughing, having fun chatting, or even dancing. If you are in public, let her think: "What an interesting, funny girl. It would be nice to get to know her better." If he constantly sees that you are moping or looking bored or sad, will he want to deal with you? Sure, you have to pretend to be having fun just to get his attention, but be that girl who has a great time.

    • He should be glad to be in your way - not that you are looking for a guy who will make you happy.
  1. Don't always be there. If you get to know a guy a little and he wants to spend time together, you should be happy about it, but don't act like your schedule is always free. Make him guess. Maybe you have a whole list of other interesting dates. Maybe you have some fun plans for the weekend with your girlfriends. Maybe you like to spend your Friday evenings alone translating Latvian poetry into English. He doesn't have to know what you're up to, but the fact that you're not always free means he should value time with you and that you're a dynamic person with lots to do.

    Don't give up on alternatives. If you've started dating or just hanging out with him a lot, you shouldn't show him how much you like him right away. He needs to feel special to want to date you, but don't tell him that he's the only guy in your life and you want to be his girlfriend as soon as possible. He needs to understand that he should offer to date you (if you want to), and not that he is the only one. This does not mean that you should be cheating - you just have to be open to any options.

    Don't push too hard. Playing hard to get can help you intrigue a guy. Even if you think he's the one, you shouldn't jump on him, tell him how sexy he is, or compliment him all the time. Most guys like to give it their all; if you want him to think you deserve it, show him that the hunt never ends. In addition, many happy married couples say that the key to their love is that the hunt never stops; if you want to intrigue a guy, you don't have to lay everything out at once in the first five minutes.

    Don't tell him everything about yourself. If you want to intrigue a guy, then you can't let him think that he knows everything about you after the first conversation. Show him your creative side by talking to him about your poems, and then show him your knowledge of the sport by giving your opinion on who will win the World Cup next time you meet. Don't tell him your biography; let him know that you spent half a year in India or were born in Alaska, over time, and not because you shared with him all the details of your life.

    Leave him to languish in anticipation. If you want to intrigue a guy, then you should leave as soon as everything is fine. Don't let a great conversation turn into a discussion about your grandmother's skin fungus; when you feel like everything is going well, tell him that it was nice talking to him and that you need to leave. Don't do it abruptly if it doesn't make sense in the context or might seem rude; but if you're in the hallway, for example, don't talk to him until the bell rings and you're late for class. Have a few words to make him want to continue the conversation, and wave goodbye to him.

    Part 2

    Intriguing Qualities
    1. Be independent. Men are intrigued by women who know what they want and go about their business. If a guy thinks that you are one of those girls who will grab onto him and want to do everything together, he may be overwhelmed with emotions and he will be scared. Instead, show him that you have your own interests, friends, and goals and that you want to do your favorite activities with or without him.

      Be playful. Don't be too serious from the start. Remember that if a guy likes you, there's a chance he's already imagined dating you, so you need to be fun, easy-going, and able to have a dynamic, engaging conversation when you're together. Don't pick on him or start long, pointless conversations or let him know you're in a bad mood. Be fun, don't take yourself too seriously, and tease the guy a little if he likes it. He will be intrigued by your ability to enjoy life and have a great time.

      Be happy. Men are intrigued by strong, confident women who are comfortable in their own bodies. You don't have to make him think that you're insecure and want to fill a void in your life by dating him, or he'll feel a lot of pressure around you. Instead, show him that you like the way you look, that you love what you do, and that you are happy with the people around you in life. If you are already happy, then he will most likely be happy with you too.

      Be unpredictable. If you don't want a guy to think he can read you like an open book. Surprise him. Go on an unplanned journey. Make a wheel. Show off your perfect French in the middle of a conversation about Paris. Show him what can be expected of you, anything, and you can always interest him. Change your outfits and hairstyles, and don't let him get used to your look.

      Be impressive. Show him that you are an accomplished, amazing woman. Stand out for something, your achievements in sports or career success. Help at a homeless shelter. Make decorations. Do something unique and impressive because you love it and show him what you can do. We're not saying that you should do something just to impress the guy you're putting on this show for. Show him that you are talented, hardworking and amazing and you will intrigue him even more.

    • Don't be superficial or moody. Guys are annoyed, even such girls are angry. Always smile and be friendly. So you will become even more mysterious.
    • Is there a special event coming up in your life? A birthday, a hike, the movie you've been waiting for is coming out, or your favorite restaurant is opening near your house? Casually mention it before the event, but don't tell him what it will be. Then, invite him the day before the holiday! He will be pleased that you invited him.
    • Don't overdo it, don't ignore or push him away. For someone to be truly interested in you, you need to give them half of the information and have them beg you to tell you the rest.

    Warnings

    • However, don't be too mysterious. He might think you're emo, weirdo, or hiding something. Be interesting, not mysterious.
    • Don't refuse to give him your number. 9 times out of 10, he'll think you're not interested or get upset when he finds out you're playing with him. If a guy is so "intrigued" by you that he asks for your number, make him happy. So HE will have to call YOU to ask you out on a date.
    • Be careful when you try not to go into details. If a guy asks you what kind of music do you like and you say “I like rock…”, and about food: “I like Italian food…”, and then: “I like ballet flats… I like ice cream… I love animals…” , you may seem extremely boring. Change it. Mention that you like chocolate ice cream or that dolphins are your favorite animal. Don't make him think you don't have your own opinion.
    • Mysteriousness may or may not help you get a boyfriend. It all depends on his character. Get to know him a little first before trying this to see if these techniques will work for him.

“Guys are lucky,” young girls sometimes think. - Did you like the young lady? There is no need to suffer, suffer." And indeed, from the outside it looks like this: he approached, met, offered to go on a date, and only then everything depends only on the male fantasy. A bouquet of roses, a cup of coffee, a romantic walk, a few compliments and good puns - it seems that sympathy is guaranteed, which means that innocent flirting can turn into something more serious. Is it so? Not always, but there is some truth in this statement.

It is more difficult for girls, because even now it is widely believed that sweet and modest young ladies should not take the initiative in relations with a man. However, waiting for the weather by the sea is also not an option, because a miracle (in the form of the appearance of a representative of the royal family on a white horse) may not happen.

If you have been puzzling over the question of how to attract a guy for a long time, read the following recommendations from experts.

A fair question: why do men follow some girls, while the opposite sex does not pay attention to other, prettier ones? It turns out that to attract male interest, you need at least two components, which we will talk about.

Rule #1

Common truth: women love with their ears, and representatives of the strong half of humanity - with their eyes. So psychologists agree with this statement, pointing out that the first impression of us is based, first of all, on appearance, and only then the interlocutors pay attention to speech and spoken words.

To attract male attention, it is absolutely not necessary to be a fashion model with imposed and practically unattainable parameters.

The main condition is naturalness and harmony. Clothing, hairstyle and manicure should be “natural”, neat and not cause rejection.

War paint is not recommended. Yes, excessively bright shades in makeup can attract the attention of a handsome young man, but they are unlikely to really interest him.

Rule #2

A girl who is pretty to herself will definitely like the people around her. Self-confidence does not mean arrogance and snobbery at all. Adequate self-esteem helps to live in peace with yourself and really treat your capabilities.

Show that you are confident. The easiest and most obvious way is a beautiful posture. She not only paints the girl, but also gives the happy owner of a majestic gait external confidence. How to achieve it? Keep your back straight and your chin slightly raised. To this it is worth adding a smile and cheerful "lights" in the eyes.

If one of your features is modesty, do not despair. Firstly, many young people prefer modest young ladies. Secondly, to give confidence and help certain psychological exercises.

Several effective methods

So, the object of adoration is chosen, you need to start specific steps - attracting attention, getting to know each other and the first communication. How can you attract a guy? With the help of the following simple and effective, and, most importantly, time-tested and other girls methods.

  1. Try to get past it. To get noticed, go towards your girlfriend, acquaintance, to something that “interested” you. This is necessary so that the young man can appreciate your cute outfit, beautiful posture and attractive smile. When passing by, do not slow down, behave naturally.
  2. Meet your eyes. Of course, you should not stare at him for hours, just catch his eye and not look away for a few seconds. So the guy will understand that you like him. You can smile a little to show some interest.
  3. P make a good impression. Take care of the positive first effect. If the guy you like comes up to you, you should not giggle, play pranks, and generally behave unnaturally. A pleasant smile and a few meaningless phrases will be enough. In general, demonstrate your own friendliness.
  4. Connect "body language". All your gestures should speak of confidence and the desire to communicate (in no case should you behave unleashed). Try to keep your head straight, do not slouch, do not fiddle with beads, watches or the hem of your blouse. On the contrary, lean towards the man, but do not touch him.
  5. Flirting is a must. Flirting is a non-committal behavior that only indicates your disposition towards a guy. It should not be confused with obsession and vulgarity. Just keep chatting fun and easy. Your naturalness will say more than specific words about sympathy.
  6. Watch out for his personal space. According to psychologists, all people have a personal space, the observance of which guarantees psychological comfort. If a man lets you closer than a meter, you are doing everything right. At this stage, you can already gently touch him and understand how much he likes you.

Men overreact to certain gestures. So, licking a girl's lips and touching her hair are considered quite bold and attractive signals. They can be used when communicating with the man you like, but dosed.

Rules for the first communication

If the task of how to lure the guy you like to yourself is solved, you should proceed to the next stage - positive communication.

We think every girl will agree with the statement that attracting male attention is only half the battle. It is extremely important to consolidate the result obtained without spoiling the impression of yourself during communication.

Good manners are as follows:

  1. Be sincerely interested in what your interlocutor is talking about. It's great if you find common interests, this will help build further communication. But in a conversation, do not "go too far", asking the young man for things, let's say, of a personal nature.
  2. Wanting to embellish themselves, the girls begin to invent absolutely incredible stories about their person. Imagine if your relationship gets further development, and the lie (embellishment) is then revealed. A man may decide that cheating over nothing is a feature of your character.
  3. Do not pull the “blanket” of the conversation over yourself. In fact, the representatives of the stronger sex love to talk about themselves, so give this opportunity to your interlocutor. Listen carefully, trying to remember the information. A few memorable facts about the guy that you said at the next meeting (if there is one) will show your interest.

It is easy to spoil the dialogue that has begun, since you are just opening up to each other. To ensure that communication continues to flow in the direction you need, avoid things such as:

  • memories of a former lover and old relationships;
  • comparison of the interlocutor with the former cordial friend;
  • complaints about life's troubles;
  • vulgar buzzwords and, especially, profanity.

There are a lot of tips on how. But love is so mysterious and inexplicable that it is absolutely impossible to reduce it to certain rules and recommendations. Feelings between a boy and a girl can flare up suddenly - after a single phrase, look or touch. However, if you liked a young man, you can and should try the available methods of drawing attention to your person.